Flunked

All of us know the sting of failure.

Maybe we came up short in the big game, or got passed over for that promotion, or just sucked at trivia night after too many drinks.

But consider the tenacity of Cha Sa-soon, an elderly woman who failed the South Korean drivers’ test 960 times. She spent over $10,000 taking and retaking the test until she finally passed. The woman now holds the world's record for most failed attempts.

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To the Bitterest of Bitter Ends

It’s enough to make you feel bad for William Jennings Bryan. 

Of course, you may fuzzily recall this guy’s name from your high school history class. Today, Bryan is remembered for three things:

Giving the Cross of Gold speech, whatever that was.

Looking like a buffoon during the Scopes Monkey Trail.

Becoming the only nominee of a major political party to lose the popular vote three times.

But that last shred of infamy is in serious jeopardy, because the homunculus of racism—Donald Trump—recently announced that he is back, baby, and running for president once more.

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Lazy & Crazy

The most disturbing statistic I have seen recently is the following: Trump voters are 50% more likely than Biden voters to be sperm donors.

This creeps me out on a political, cultural, and even biological level.

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The Kids Are Alright

Every American under the age of 30 has conscious memory of just two Republican presidents.

One was a blithering idiot who led the nation into disaster.

The other was a sociopathic lunatic who led the nation into disaster.

Note to Republicans: When the best of your best are stupid and/or crazy, maybe the problem is your political party.

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The Infinite Cycle

This year’s World Series did not feature my hometown Milwaukee Brewers, who failed to reach the Fall Classic for the 40th consecutive season. Just thought I would point that out.

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